Thursday, January 27, 2011

Ecstasy Makes Everything Better

A fellow walks into a restaurant, orders a drink and asks the waiter if he'd like to hear a good BYU joke. "Listen, buddy," the waiter growled. "See those two big guys on your left? They were both linemen on the BYU football team. And that huge fellow on your right was a world-class wrestler at the Y. That guy in the corner was the Y.'s all-time champion weightlifter. And I lettered in three sports at the Y. Now, are you absolutely positive you want to go ahead and tell your joke here?"

"Nah, guess not," the man replied. "I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times.'
Don't be mad.  It's funny....

Remember how I go to the U now?  Well, I'm in a Web Design class.  Usually, classes like this are a little more chill and fun compared to other classes.  Especially in this class.  It's hilarious.  I hear so many funny things that it takes all of my power to not just burst out in laughter.  Don't believe me?  

Story 1:

1st day of class, and the teacher wants us to go around the class to introduce ourselves.  Along with that, he wants us to do a cool trick.  Me?  I don't do cool tricks.  So, I pretended that I just learned how to snap during Christmas Break.  Lies.  But, he believed me and I didn't have to get up and humiliate myself in front of the class.  Towards the end of the class, one kid gets up (who is now my partner for the rest of the semester, thank you very much) and introduces himself.  His cool talent is that he can "liquid dance" and he does a quick demonstration.  The teacher (who by the way is pretty awesome and just jokes with us all) looks at the student and jokingly says "that's not cool enough to pass as your trick".  THEN a girl in the back of the class stands up and in his defense says loudly "No, really. It's way cool.  Especially when you are at a club, and there is loud music, strobe lights and your on ecstasy."  

Wait, did that just happen?

Yes, yes it did.

The look on the teachers face was priceless.

Story 2:

Wednesday after MLK break, teacher asked us all if we did anything fun over the break.  No one did, except for Ecstasy girl (from now on, she will be referred to as ecstasy girl.  Because, I just don't know her real name.  And, I guess I will protect her real identity.)  So, Ecstasy had a pretty wild weekend that we got to hear all about.  Convo went something like this:

Teacher:  No one did anything fun over the break?
Ecstasy:  Oh OOh!  I did!!  (waving hand in air briskly, impatiently awaiting to be called upon)
Teacher:  (With nervous look on his face about what the entire class will about to hear)  Okay [ecstasy], lets hear it.
Ecstasy:  So, I went to this club and totally got drugged.  It was sooo funny.
Teacher:  [blank stare on face]

Story 3:

This story unfortunately does not feature Ecstasy.  

After class, some of the guys were talkin about the BYU vs SDSU game and how cool it is going to be. (Utes talking about how cool something BYU is involved in is... weird.  Didn't know that happened.)  T
The story went a little something like this:

Boy 1:  So, do you think Jimmer can do it again tonight?
Boy 2:  Nah, Jimmer is just some typical Provo boy.
Boy 1:  No he's not!  Jimmer is black!  Typical Provo boys are NOT black.
Boy 2:  Jimmer is not black.  He's SO white.
Boy 1:  Whatever.  No one that good at basketball can be white.  You have to be black, it's basically a rule.
Boy 2:  I'm googling it.

Yep.  Boy 2 won that battle.  Jimmer is in fact white.  And, it looks like he's pretty good at what he does.

Life is entertaining at the U.  I promise to further entertain you with more stories from school.  They are just too good not to share!

If you didn't like that joke just because it was about BYU, then put SDSU in where it says BYU and it will probably be more funny to you.

1 comment:

  1. haha. You're funny! I think you should give everyone names based on something they've done or talked about. What would mine be?